It seems that since I am about to turn twenty-nine, my pondering on life is increasing exponentially. Am I the only one?
I said in my other post that I thought I was going to be famous. I really, truly thought I was going to be famous. I didn't know how, but it was going to happen. At one point (until I was twenty-four) I wanted to be First Lady. I DID NOT want to be President because that is too much work, but I wanted to be like Jackie Kennedy, and now, Michelle Obama. You know the well dressed, beautiful wife of the President. Then I realized that I would have to be married to the President. (Can you say stress?) Then I thought about reality TV, but have you ever seen/heard of
I had many ambitious dreams of being famous (and I think still do in a small way- I mean, hello, I have a blog- open for all to read). I really thought that I was meant to do extraordinary things. I felt that I was going to change the world, and everyone in it. The reality is I don't offer anything that will make me famous, and I am not extraordinary. I am an ordinary girl, with a few regrets and a few unfulfilled dreams (some that can still come true- I'm not dead). I used to think that was a bad thing. I don't anymore. I don't need to be extraordinary or famous to make me happy or to have a good life.
Even if my dreams and ambitions don't come true, for me it is the planning and the dreaming and not the fulfillment of a dream that brings me the most happiness. You know the "it's the journey not the destination"? I totally understand that now. I like it.
Some may think that this is depressing. It is not meant to be. I am perfectly happy being ordinary. Most people are ordinary. I think it is what I do with ordinary that will make the difference.
5 comments:
Emily, you are far from ordinary. Ordinary implies boring or unimpressive, and you are neither of those things. Just because you are not going be the First Lady, or someone who the whole world knows, does not mean that you are not going to raise a child that will affect the whole world. I realized about 2 1/2 years ago when Eli was born that alot of the dreams and amibitions that I had for myself were not going to happen, so instead I try to put my effort into making Elijah and Emme's dreams and ambitions come true.
You are famous - people all over the world listen to you and can't wait for what comes next, and you are extraordinary... you're a mom! Talk about being a superhero!! :) I know what you are saying though. Dreams are nice - sure would be boring without them - but the important thing is to recognize how blessed you are with real life.
Liz- thank you you are very kind. You are right are kids are amazing. I am pretty sure I had big dreams because my parents let me believe I could be anything. I hope I can do that for the boys.
Connie- yes motherhood is an extraordinary thing. I think real life usually turns out better than dreams. It is fabulous.
Hmm, I don't think it's a depressing post (per your follow-up). I used to want to to be an influential person (famous in my own way, although not out of a small, nerdy circle!), until I realized that I don't want to give up on the things I like in life, like downtime, free evenings, and having fun with friends.
Good for you. Making that realization will let you live a little freer. =D
Emily--You've made a difference in our life (and I'm sure many other's that you're not aware of)we love you. I'd consider you famous in our family circle.
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