7.08.2010

Complete and Total DISASTER!

It is a really good thing Thomas will not remember his first birthday.  Especially the cake.  There are two things I need to point out.  First, several friends and a beloved cousin have recently taken cake decorating classes and have posted pictures of yummy, creative looking cakes.  Now, being ambitious, I thought I could give my kid a good looking cake.  Second, if you and I are ever in the same room as each other and the words "it can't be that hard" come out of my mouth I would probably duck and cover, or put on some sort of protective gear, speak in soft, soothing tones, and try to talk me down.  Consider yourself warned.  Seriously.
It begins when I realize that I have two kids born within three days of each other.  That makes for a lot of uneaten cake.  I thought, hey, I will go buy one cupcake for each person for each birthday, that way, nothing is wasted.  Then I went to Walmart and cake mixes were on sale.  What a better idea, for less than a dollar I can make cupcakes and it will be so much less expensive.  When I went to make the cupcakes, I realized I didn't have any cupcake papers.  Unfortunately, the stores here in Tijuana don't have them either.  The directions clearly say use cupcake liners (and I always follow directions), so either I go across the border and find some or I get creative.  (Anyone else nervous about this idea?)  I decide to make a 9x13 cake, cut it in half and make a square cake.  Cute, right?  Unless it is a really crumbly cake and falls apart in the process.  It's cool, though, because frosting fixes everything.  I didn't buy frosting, because that is way below me, and I know I can make frosting.  Even better, I find a box of food coloring in the cupboard.  Food coloring, awesome, I didn't even know we had food coloring.  I let Jack pick the color.  RED.  He wants red.  Well, red looks pink, and Thomas certainly can't have a pink cake for his first birthday, so I add yellow for orange, but that doesn't look right either, so I add blue to make purple. Wrong again.  Oh, please, this is getting really bad, and really gross.  Then I give up on a mauve-ish color and start spreading it on.  I can't go on.  I will let the pictures tell the rest of the story.




It didn't even taste good.  Have any of you seen Thomas eat?  Well, he eats just about anything, except his cake.  He ended up eating a chocolate Pop Tart. 



Dear Thomas,
I apologize.  I was wrong.  I won't do it again.
Love,
Mom

18 comments:

Anja said...

LOL...oh Emily. I wish you lived close, I could help you. I must say though you put up a heck of a fight, I would have quit much earlier than you did!

Z. Marie said...

I carry cupcake liners around the world with me. No, I rarely make cupcakes, I just want to be prepared.
He's not going to remember it, so you can't consider it trauma.
It's OK, really!

Bfiles said...

oh, wow. I'm sorry your cake was not a success! next time! Happy birthday to your sweet baby boy, and congrats to mom and dad, too!

Rebekah said...

Seriously, thanks for the laugh today!

Janalu said...

OMG that is hilarious, I am dying right now. I'm not even going to lie,it does look awful but at least you will never forget it!

Just US said...

I love the idea of cutting the cake in half and then frosting it! Maybe it will work better next time. Happy Birthday little Thomas!

Emily Horrocks said...

wow, Em...geez, I'm speechless. ;)

someday Thomas will laugh...I have a feeling there will be more pictures and moments just like these in the future.

you are a sweet Mom though and are learning through every moment.

maybe next time you should just buy a cake. :)

Jen said...

Aw! I remember crying over Kelsey's Dora cake at 1:30 am, the night before her second birthday party. I swore never again...then the next year....and so it goes...

And it's true, they don't remember that stuff...we are the ones who stress needlessly!

A Daring Adventure said...

ROTFL!!!

Oh my gosh, girl -

1.) You are the funniest writer. You crack me up!! That post was hysterical

2.) But not half as funny as the pictures of that cake!!! That cake made me laugh so hard my sides were hurting! Seriously - that's the funniest thing I think I've ever seen. Know why?

3.) Because that is TOTALLY something I would make. If I tried to make something like that. Except mine would look worse. And I wouldn't be able to write anything funny about it!!

Emily Horrocks said...

Em Thx for your comments - Van was very similiar to how Jack was at the beach - he was very hesitant to go to the water. Then again, he's scared of just about everything. Our babies are all so stinkin' cute! As far as the carrier goes, it was provided by the Balti Aquarium since strollers weren't allowed. However, we have one just like it that we bought for $2 at a yard sale. Its just a backpack carrier and can hold up to 35 lbs or something crazy. I hope you find something you like!

jasonandjodie said...

oh, how this made me laugh! I'm sorry it was such a disaster, but you're so right that Thomas will not even remember. You're such a great mom - even trying the whole cake thing is too much for lots. We're still impressed. We'll have to go out to ice cream to celebrate all the summer birthdays when we're out there.

Brittany said...

Its not easy.....I hear ya sista!

Noble Glomads said...

I love your blog. I too am and FSO spouse with 2 boys though mine are bigger :) I'm not much of a baker but for my son's 2nd B Day I endeavored to make a cake in the shape of a school bus (yeah, I know). I found that slightly freezing the cake made it easier to cut and it held up better. I too, learn these things thru trial and error. Thanks for the giggles.

JCooper said...

Oh my gosh Em - your post has me cracking up! You're right though, the pictures are even better. Just think, if you had done some regular cake, it would not have been noteworthy. This one, however, you guys will be laughing about for years. A+ for effort girl! I love it!!

hannah said...

I feel like you need to read Cake Wrecks... I mean, that' dedicated to cakes made by pros, but still, I think it will make you feel better! Cheers!

Connie said...

I buy cupcake papers in bulk whenever I see them! They aren't easy to find :D And I will not giggle at the cake... I am still learning how to make desserts and while I have my good moments, I also create a bit of chaos myself. Besides, that mauve color is much nicer than the steel grey my son and I once created. I swear, it looked like a brushed aluminum cake!

Jessica said...

This is a popular post for obvious reasons...so funny to read and remember the times I thought something looked easy and I was sure I could do it and ended up with lousy results. But fun memories.

Donna said...

Too funny! What an awful looking cake. Oh well - you have an entire year to practice. Or, you know, find a cake decorator.

Happy birthday!

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